Top 10 Chinese Wedding Gifts.
At a Chinese wedding the gift is almost always money, and the etiquette around it is precise. Physical gifts are less common and carry more risk — several everyday objects are strongly taboo for reasons that are not obvious to outsiders.
What not to give
Read this before the list below. These are not preferences — several are genuine offences, and they are the part most gift guides leave out.
- A clock — never Giving a clock (送钟) is homophonous with attending a funeral (送终). The single worst gift you can give.
- Anything in fours Four sounds like death. Four of anything, or an amount containing 4.
- Sharp objects Knives and scissors symbolise severing the relationship.
- Umbrellas San (伞) puns on 散, to separate.
- Shoes Xie (鞋) puns on 邪, evil, and implies the recipient will walk away.
- White or black wrapping Both are funeral colours. Red or gold only.
- Pears Li (梨) puns on 离, to part.
The ten
- 01
Hongbao (red envelope) — the default
Cash in a red envelope. This is what is expected and what the couple wants.
- 02
Gold jewellery
Traditionally from close family, particularly the groom’s. A dragon-and-phoenix bangle is the classic.
- 03
Tea set
Ties to the tea ceremony, and used afterwards. Choose a proper one.
- 04
A pair of anything
Pairs symbolise the couple — twin pillows, matching lamps, two vases.
- 05
Double happiness (囍) homeware
The character on bedding, cushions or ceramics.
- 06
Red or gold decorative items
Both colours are auspicious. Red especially.
- 07
Chopstick sets
The word for chopsticks puns on “quickly have a son”. Given in pairs.
- 08
Quality bedding in red
Practical and auspicious. A common family gift.
- 09
Fine tea or dried delicacies
Abalone, sea cucumber and good tea are traditional prestige gifts.
- 10
Jade pendant or bangle
A significant gift, usually from an elder.
If you are giving money
Hongbao amounts should be even, and should avoid the digit 4 — 四 sounds like 死, death. 8 is the luckiest digit. Typical urban amounts run ¥800–1,800 or S$100–300, and the honest guide is to at least cover your seat at the banquet. Use crisp notes and a genuinely red envelope, never white.
Written as common practice. Regional and family variation is enormous — if you are close enough to the couple to ask, ask. Nobody has ever been offended by the question.